i'm a very impressionable person. i dont think theres a single aspect of me that wasnt influenced by someone or something else. this disgusts me, but it isnt something
that can be undone. theres a lot of things that im learning i have no control of. and while this may be common knowledge, i do things in extremes. the things i dont have
control over do not matter in the slightest. the things i can control, i have to take hold of 100%. i need to gauge everything by level of relevence. anything that i would
normally do by time im 18, i still need to do. ie: school, driving, job. other things such as social life have been lifted from me completely. the more people in my life,
the higher the chances of second guessing or being found out. i occupy myself. i wouldnt say that im lonely. i know its for the greater good. all i seem to do is hurt people.
so i would never encourage befriending me. that being said, many other things keep me company. music, firstly. a wide variety. my favorite as of may 2020 is ic3peak.