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hiiii i am high and still drinking coffee but it is 2pm. today is three years since my mom died. it doesnt feel like three years. so much has happened in three years.
it makes me think where i'll be in another three, twenty years old. holy shit man.. in another three years i'll be twenty.. thats.. unfathomable. my limit used to be
16, then 18. neither of those are going to happen. im not going to die a teenager. id be lying if i said that doesnt bum me out. but its okay, because i have things to do
& places to go. i want as many years with niko as possible. whats the limit now? surely i cant reach 30..maybe. gah idk.. ill figure it out later. i recently discovered
that i DIDNT delete all my flashdrive videos from when i was talking to vince & fabio. videos from may, june. then i stopped because we fell apart & i fell in love with
niko. given i couldve kept up the videos throughout all of that, but i didnt. i made one yesterday though! felt good to just talk. i did mention to niko that i know majority
of my (our) videos will never even see the light of day.. & that sucks but. all we can do is give enough content that they cant keep ALL of it under wraps. true crime researches
are usually nosey as fuck anyways. UUUUM WHAT ELSE. starting watching the 100 with niko finally. i like it a lot so far, i have a crush on bellamy. i think subconsciously
its just to counteract his crush on octavia. oh fictional jealousy. im typing this 2 avoid school.. i see niko listening to his dylan playlist. todays playlist cover is dylan as well.
patron saint in ur head a bit baby? thats a very good thing, listen to him. andrews been all up in my head recently, not sure why. she felt the same way about reb&v so.. its probably
that. it all leads back to them, im telling you.


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